Logic or Empathy? How Your Myers-Briggs® Character Sort Responds to Feelings

Ever marvel how completely different character sorts deal with another person’s emotional meltdown? Do they whip out a logical answer, or do they sit down with you and validate each feeling? I ran a survey to see precisely how every Myers-Briggs® sort responds when somebody involves them in emotional misery, and the outcomes have been eye-opening! Let’s dive into the outcomes.

However first, let’s take a look at the demographics:

5,032 individuals accomplished the survey.
78.47% have been feminine
18.75% have been male
1.49% have been non-binary
1.29% most well-liked to not say

Unsure what your character sort is? You’ll be able to take our in-depth character questionnaire right here. Or you may strive the official MBTI® check right here.

Logic or Empathy? How Your Myers-Briggs® Character Sort Responds to Feelings

ESTJ – The Commander

When feelings are operating excessive, ESTJs step in with construction and options. They don’t do chaos—60% of ESTJs dive straight into logical problem-solving, analyzing the scenario to determine the trigger and essentially the most environment friendly repair. They’ll take a second to ask questions—33.33% mentioned they hear first—however they’re actually simply gathering the details earlier than rolling out the motion plan.

ESTJs are wired for steadiness. They depend on their previous experiences to information their selections and provides recommendation grounded in actuality. When you’re spiraling, they’ll remind you of a time you overcame one thing related, pulling from their psychological Rolodex of previous wins to supply reassurance. However if you happen to’re anticipating somebody to validate each feeling, you may be out of luck—solely 6.67% of ESTJs deal with emotional validation.

Right here’s what you’ll seemingly get from an ESTJ in disaster mode:

• A fast evaluation of the scenario—trigger and impact, nothing extra.
• A dive into their very own experiences for sensible knowledge.
• A rock-solid plan of motion to get you again in your ft.
• A reminder that you simply’ve dealt with worse earlier than.

Some individuals discover this extremely comforting—in spite of everything, who doesn’t desire a reliable one that can minimize via the emotional fog and provide you with a transparent method ahead? Others, nonetheless, would possibly really feel like they’re being advised what to do, or they may need extra empathy and fewer motion. ESTJs imply effectively, however their strategy isn’t for everybody.

ESFJ – The Nurturer

ESFJs are like emotional radar methods—they choose up on how everybody’s feeling and tune proper in. 48.15% of them hear and ask questions first, ensuring that everybody feels heard and understood. When feelings are excessive, they’re there with a hug, some heartfelt recommendation, and perhaps even a home made casserole if it feels acceptable (if my expertise is any indicator). 25.93% deal with validating feelings, providing empathy and emotional assist and ensuring you understand that it’s okay to really feel no matter you’re feeling.

Logical options? Probably not their forte—solely 7.41% talked about leaping straight to problem-solving. ESFJs favor to ease the emotional burden earlier than speaking practicalities, which is sensible as a result of their entire strategy is centered on attentiveness and emotional connection.

Right here’s how an ESFJ sometimes handles a disaster:

• They’ll dive into the main points, asking questions to grasp what’s happening.
• They’ll draw from their very own experiences to supply recommendation or sensible assist (like organizing a meal practice if issues get severe).
• Emotional connection is essential—they’ll tune into what you’re feeling and ensure you know they’re proper there with you.
• Anticipate verbal reassurance, empathy, and perhaps a suggestion to assist with no matter’s weighing you down.

Folks normally respect this stage of care. ESFJs are regular, dependable, and so they’re all the time prepared to go the additional mile. However for some, particularly the extra impartial or logic-driven sorts, this may really feel a bit too hands-on and even intrusive. When you’re searching for emotional distance, the ESFJ’s model of nurturing would possibly take you abruptly—however no less than you’ll by no means really feel unsupported.

ISTJ – The Sensible Drawback Solver

ISTJs will calmly step in, assess the scenario, and get issues shifting in the precise course. 45.45% of ISTJs in our survey mentioned they leap straight to logical options, so if you happen to’re searching for somebody to create a finances, arrange your schedule, or simply make sense of the chaos, that’s going to be their course. However they gained’t bulldoze via—they’ll hear first, with 31.82% saying they take time to ask questions and acquire the details earlier than diving in.

Now, if you happen to’re hoping for a heart-to-heart, you may be slightly disillusioned. Solely 9.09% of ISTJs mentioned they validate individuals’s emotions. They’re right here to unravel issues, and don’t all the time know the precise phrases to make you’re feeling really empathized with. So if you happen to’re after some emotional consolation, you would possibly need to chat with an ISFJ. However if you happen to want somebody who’ll construct a strong, step-by-step plan, you’re in the precise place.

Right here’s what to anticipate from an ISTJ in motion:

• They’ll ask you just a few pointed inquiries to get all of the details.
• Then, they’ll piece collectively what went unsuitable and the way to repair it, no drama, simply logic.
• Subsequent, they’ll map out a sensible answer, full with timelines
• They usually gained’t simply drop the plan in your lap—they’ll see it via to the top.

Some individuals love this type of regular, no-nonsense assist—it’s like having your personal life organizer. However if you happen to’re searching for a shoulder to cry on, the ISTJ’s strategy can really feel a bit…scientific. When you get that their method of serving to is thru motion, not emotion, it’s simpler to understand the way in which they care.

Discover out extra about ISTJs: The ISTJ Si-Fi Loop: When Routine Turns into a Rut

ISFJ – The Compassionate Caregiver

When you want a shoulder to cry on, ISFJs are prepared with empathy and luxury. 42.31% of ISFJs in our survey mentioned they’ll hear and ask questions first, ensuring they absolutely perceive what’s happening earlier than leaping in. And if you happen to’re feeling susceptible, you’re in good palms—30.77% mentioned they’ll validate your feelings, providing that reassuring “it’s okay to really feel this manner” vibe. They gained’t rush you thru the method; they’ll patiently be there, providing quiet assist, typically with some sensible assistance on the aspect.

Don’t be shocked in the event that they keep in mind all of the little particulars from previous conversations—they’ll seemingly use that information to tailor their response to precisely what you want. Whether or not it’s bringing over a meal or simply being there with a listening ear, ISFJs need you to really feel protected with them.

Right here’s what you may anticipate from an ISFJ in motion:

• They’ll ask mild inquiries to get the total image of what’s happening.
• They’ll draw from previous experiences and recollections to supply useful recommendation or sensible assist.
• Emotional validation for all kinds of ideas and feelings
• Anticipate sensible assist, whether or not it’s a quiet act of service or a useful suggestion.

ISFJs make individuals really feel deeply cared for, however for sorts who desire a extra logical answer to the issue, their stage of attentiveness would possibly really feel a bit too emotions-driven. Nonetheless, when the world feels prefer it’s falling aside, there’s one thing undeniably comforting about having somebody so dependable and caring in your aspect.

Uncover extra about ISFJs: 10 Issues You Crave Each Day as an ISFJ

ENTJ – The Visionary Drawback-Solver

When life throws chaos your method, an ENTJ isn’t going to take a seat again and anticipate issues to resolve themselves. 57.89% of ENTJs leap proper into problem-solving mode, slicing via the drama to seek out essentially the most environment friendly answer. When you want somebody that will help you see the massive image and give you a plan to beat your issues, they’re your individual. They’ll hear—31.58% take time to ask questions first—however feelings are secondary to technique right here.

They’re not prone to get slowed down in emotions, however they’ll crack a joke to maintain issues mild when wanted. 5.26% mentioned they use humor to diffuse rigidity, balancing their intense problem-solving strategy with simply sufficient levity to maintain you from feeling overwhelmed. I can say from my expertise that my dad (an ENTJ) all the time had some off-the-wall, darkish humor supposed to assist us cope with tough occasions.

Right here’s what you’ll seemingly get from an ENTJ:

• A fast evaluation of the scenario, breaking it down into manageable components.
• A no-nonsense, long-term technique to repair the issue for good.
• Possibly a joke or two, however they’re primarily about motion, not emotional assist.

Some individuals respect their directness—if you happen to’re searching for a pacesetter to take cost, the ENTJ is your man (or woman). However for these needing empathy, their easy strategy can really feel a bit too blunt.

ENFJ – The Empathetic Chief

ENFJs lead with their coronary heart, and it reveals. 38.10% of ENFJs mentioned they hear and ask questions, specializing in ensuring you’re feeling understood. 28.57% validate feelings, providing encouragement and empathy in spades. They’ve bought a pure reward for uplifting others, so anticipate to stroll away from an ENFJ feeling each heard and motivated.

By the way in which, if you happen to actually need to see an ENFJ character in motion, comforting, empathizing, and attempting to assist others, watch Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba. Tanjiro Kamado, the protoganist, is the last word ENFJ warrior and comforter. I’m watching this sequence with my 10-year-old now and I maintain pondering that Tanjiro is such an inspiration as an ENFJ.

However again to the purpose. ENFJs gained’t simply sit there and nod alongside whenever you’re struggling—they’ll additionally provide useful ideas or recommendation. Whereas 14.29% of ENFJs mentioned they leap to logical options, they all the time take care to wrap these options in empathy, ensuring you’re feeling emotionally supported all through the method.

Right here’s what you may anticipate from an ENFJ:

• They’ll hear with full consideration and ask considerate questions to grasp your emotional state.
• They’ll validate your emotions whereas additionally providing recommendation or doable options.
• Anticipate encouragement, empathy, and maybe a perspective that lifts you out of your emotional fog.

ENFJs are identified for his or her heat and perception, and so they’re the kinds you go to whenever you want somebody who will actually “get” the place you’re coming from. Nevertheless, for individuals who favor a extra indifferent, logical strategy, the ENFJ’s emotional depth and probing questions would possibly really feel a bit overwhelming.

INTJ – The Strategic Fixer

INTJs are masters of effectivity. When an issue arises, 53.73% of INTJs go straight to discovering a logical answer, utilizing their sharp analytical expertise to interrupt down even essentially the most deep and complex emotional points. They might really feel rather less positive of themselves on the subject of managing your feelings, although—solely 8.21% mentioned they validate feelings. Their focus is on fixing the difficulty long-term, and generally they really feel awkward after they know they should provide up emotional phrases of knowledge.

They’ll, nonetheless, hearken to what it’s important to say—as introverts, they’ll take the time to ask questions and search for insights earlier than crafting a strategic answer. INTJs need to create plans that stop the identical issues from cropping up once more, and so they’ll do it with a cool, indifferent effectivity that leaves no room for drama.

Right here’s what you may anticipate from an INTJ:

• A logical breakdown of the scenario—anticipate them to investigate it from each angle.
• A transparent, strategic plan to unravel the issue, not only for now, however for the long run.
• Little emotional assist, however loads of insights and long-term agendas

INTJs are nice for long-term problem-solving, however if you happen to want emotional validation or heat, their indifferent fashion would possibly really feel a bit too chilly.

Discover out extra about INTJs: INTJs and Their Relationships with Different Character Varieties

INFJ – The Insightful Empath

INFJs have a present for understanding feelings on a deep, intuitive stage. 42.34% of INFJs mentioned they hear and ask questions, ensuring to essentially dig into the emotional layers of a scenario earlier than providing recommendation. They’re additionally large on validating feelings—34.23% present that comforting “I completely get the place you’re coming from” sort of assist.

However don’t mistake them for aimless listeners—they’ll provide options too, although solely 9.46% will leap to problem-solving straight away. INFJs usually tend to allow you to really feel heard first, then gently information you towards long-term options.

Right here’s what you may anticipate from an INFJ in a disaster:

• They’ll hear deeply, choosing up on not simply your phrases however the feelings behind them.
• They’ll validate your emotions, ensuring you understand it’s okay to be precisely the place you’re emotionally.
• They may provide insights or options, however they’ll do it with care, solely when the timing feels proper.

For many individuals, this mix of empathy and mild steerage is precisely what they want. However if you happen to’re searching for a fast repair or a extra direct strategy, you would possibly discover the INFJ’s gradual and considerate course of slightly too summary.

Uncover extra about INFJs: 10 Extraordinarily Annoying INFJ Pet Peeves

ESTP – The Fast Fixer

When feelings are excessive, the ESTP is already fascinated with the way to repair the scenario and transfer ahead. 45% of ESTPs mentioned they go straight to discovering logical options, however they’re additionally surprisingly good listeners—40% take the time to ask questions and get the total image first. ESTPs are fast on their ft and love tackling issues head-on, and so they gained’t draw back from utilizing humor—5% talked about lightening the temper when issues get too intense. That mentioned, I believe greater than 5% depend on humor. Within the survey, the respondents have been urged to decide on the very first thing they did reasonably than the “solely” factor they did, and if my expertise is any indication, I’d say much more ESTPs use humor than what was listed right here, it simply will not be the very first thing they do.

Right here’s what to anticipate when an ESTP steps in:

• They’ll ask you some inquiries to get the details straight.
• Then, they’ll instantly begin searching for essentially the most sensible, environment friendly answer.
• Anticipate humor to diffuse the stress, however they gained’t linger on feelings—they’re all about motion.

For many who need quick outcomes and a no-nonsense strategy, ESTPs are an ideal match. However if you happen to’re searching for deep emotional validation and probing insights, you would possibly really feel like they’re speeding via the feels to get to the answer.

ESFP – The Enjoyable-Loving Comforter

ESFPs have a singular capability to lighten the emotional load with empathy and humor. 50% of ESFPs mentioned they hear and ask questions, ensuring you’re feeling heard, however they’re additionally not shy about utilizing humor to diffuse rigidity—16.67% mentioned they’ll crack a joke to raise the temper. Presently my two closest pals the place I reside are ESFPs, and I can affirm they are going to discover the humorous in any scenario, even after they’re crying (otherwise you’re crying). However they’re not going to make mild of your scenario with humor. They’re emotionally in tune, with 22.22% specializing in validating your emotions, ensuring you’re feeling supported and understood.

Right here’s what to anticipate from an ESFP:

• They’ll hear and ask loads of questions, taking time to attach emotionally.
• Anticipate some humor to assist ease the stress—it’s their method of exhibiting they care.
• They may provide an answer, however solely after they’ve made positive you’re feeling emotionally supported.

ESFPs are heat, partaking, and know the way to maintain issues mild when feelings get heavy. When you want somebody that will help you really feel higher and chuckle via the ache, they’re excellent. However for these in search of a extra severe, solution-oriented strategy, the ESFP’s lighthearted fashion won’t really feel substantial sufficient.

ISTP – The Palms-On Helper

ISTPs are all about getting issues finished. 44.44% of ISTPs mentioned they go straight to logical options, shortly assessing the scenario and discovering essentially the most sensible repair. They’ll hear, however solely to assemble the mandatory particulars—30.56% ask questions earlier than diving into motion. However if you happen to’re searching for deep emotional insights and heartwarming empathy, ISTPs may be rather less adept. Whereas 13.89% mentioned they deal with this (not unhealthy for Considering sorts, to be trustworthy), a number of commented that they really feel awkward and unsure when giving empathy or phrases of affirmation.

Right here’s what to anticipate when an ISTP steps in:

• They’ll hear, however primarily to get the details straight.
• As soon as they’ve gathered the knowledge, they’ll map out a fast, sensible answer.
• They’re not normally large on emotional assist, however they’ll get issues finished with none drama.

For many who worth effectivity, ISTPs are superb—no fluff, simply options. However if you happen to’re searching for emotional validation, their hands-off, logical strategy would possibly really feel a bit distant.

ISFP – The Quiet Supporter

ISFPs are mild, empathetic, and deeply caring when somebody’s in misery. 57.14% mentioned they hear and ask questions to ensure they perceive what you’re going via. That is really the very best rating for listening of all the 16 Myers-Briggs character sorts. And I can say from expertise that I believe it matches actuality (clearly that half is simply my private opinion). Each ISFP I’ve identified has a quiet, regular aura and a strong capability to remain calm and actively hear when somebody is struggling. My daughter, an ISFP, has many occasions discovered herself the receiver of others’ tales and life struggles as a result of she asks good questions, listens, and doesn’t attempt to leap in with a number of options or logic.

After which there’s validation: 26.19% of ISFPs consider in validating first-but they’re not pushy about it. ISFPs know the way to be current with out overwhelming you.

Right here’s what you may anticipate from an ISFP in motion:

• They’ll hear quietly, ensuring you’re feeling heard with out speeding to supply recommendation.
• They’ll validate your emotions, letting you understand it’s okay to really feel the way you do.
• They may provide a small piece of recommendation, however solely whenever you appear prepared for it.

For individuals who want somebody to only be there with out attempting to repair every part, ISFPs are superb. Their mild presence provides consolation with out crowding your emotional house. However if you happen to’re searching for a extra proactive strategy, their quiet, affected person fashion would possibly really feel too passive.

ENTP – The Artistic Fixer

ENTPs love fixing issues, and 36.84% mentioned they leap to logical options when somebody’s in misery. However they’re not nearly fixing issues—they’ll additionally hear fastidiously, with 31.58% taking time to ask questions. 15.79% use humor to diffuse rigidity, retaining issues mild even when feelings run excessive. Think about Tony Stark as your comforter and also you’ll in all probability have a fairly good thought of what an ENTP would appear to be in assist mode.

Right here’s what you may anticipate from an ENTP:

• They’ll ask inquiries to get the total image earlier than providing their take.
• Anticipate inventive, outside-the-box options to your drawback.
• They’ll use humor to maintain the temper from getting too heavy.

ENTPs are nice for brainstorming and developing with recent views, however if you happen to’re searching for deep emotional connection and quiet empathy, their logical, witty fashion would possibly go away you wanting extra.

ENFP – The Optimistic Listener

ENFPs are heat, compassionate listeners who ensure you really feel understood. 43.48% mentioned they take time to hear and ask questions, whereas 30.43% deal with validating your feelings. They’ll sit with you thru the emotional storm and provide loads of empathy earlier than providing any options. And after they do provide options, anticipate creativity, creativeness, and concepts you by no means even dreamed of earlier than. That’s their instinct in motion, discovering home windows of alternative the place you as soon as noticed solely closed doorways.

Right here’s what you may anticipate from an ENFP:

• They’ll hear deeply, ensuring they absolutely perceive your scenario.
• Anticipate a number of emotional validation—they’re right here to assist you emotionally first.
• They may provide a inventive answer, however solely after you’ve felt heard.

ENFPs are perfect for these needing empathy and optimism, however if you happen to’re searching for a extra tried-and-true, logical strategy, their strategy would possibly really feel too ungrounded.

Discover out extra about ENFPs: The Darkish Aspect of the ENFP Character Sort

INTP – The Analyzer

INTPs are fast to leap into problem-solving mode—43.55% mentioned they deal with logical options. However they’re additionally good listeners. 30.63% say listening and asking questions is their go–to when serving to somebody. I’ve discovered this to be true in my expertise as effectively. After I’m coping with a difficulty, I discover that INTPs will quietly analyze the knowledge earlier than leaping again with options or concepts. In actual fact, it’s necessary to be affected person with them; some individuals need to rush them or assume that since they’re being quiet they don’t have any ideas or emotions to share. That is removed from the reality in actuality, they only want time to kind out their ideas and resolve whether or not you need recommendation or emotional assist. Within the case of emotional assist, that may generally be tough. 16.13% deal with validating others’ feelings, which is definitely pretty excessive for the pondering sorts. However fairly just a few INTPs commented that they really feel slightly awkward and uncertain when offering emotional assist, worrying that what they’re saying gained’t be “ok.”

Right here’s what to anticipate when an INTP steps in:

• They’ll hear fastidiously, analyzing the issue to seek out one of the best logical answer.
• Anticipate a number of considerate questions as they piece collectively the puzzle.
• They might  not provide a lot in the way in which of emotional assist, however this doesn’t imply they don’t care.

INTPs are perfect for these in search of rational options, however if you happen to want emotional reassurance, their quieter, analytical strategy might sound slightly too indifferent.

You may also get pleasure from: The INTP Ti-Si Loop

INFP – The Deep Empath

INFPs are all about empathy and emotional connection. 48.41% mentioned they hear and ask questions first, whereas 35.03% deal with validating feelings. They’ll sit with you thru your emotions, providing understanding and compassion, solely shifting to options whenever you’re prepared. I strive to not rush anybody via their course of,” one INFP commented, “it’s necessary for me to get the entire image of what somebody goes via, as a result of I personally hate it when individuals leap in with unsolicited recommendation.

Right here’s what to anticipate from an INFP:

• They’ll hear intently, placing themselves in your footwear to grasp your feelings.
• Anticipate a number of emotional validation—they’ll ensure you know your emotions matter.
• They’ll provide insights and inventive concepts, however solely whenever you’ve processed your feelings.

INFPs are excellent for these needing deep emotional assist, however for these in search of a extra solution-focused strategy, their reflective fashion would possibly really feel much less direct and pragmatic than is desired.

You may also get pleasure from: 10 Well-known INFPs Who Modified the World

What Do You Assume?

How do you reply when somebody involves you for assist? How do you greatest wish to obtain emotional assist? Allow us to and different readers know within the feedback! For extra info on the 16 character sorts and the way they strategy life, try our eBooks, together with Discovering You: Unlocking the Energy of Character Sort,  The INFJ – Understanding the Mystic, The INTJ – Understanding the Strategist, and The INFP – Understanding the Dreamer. You may also join with me through Fb, Instagram, or Twitter!